―More Than Tears; Lifting the Burden of Grief takes place in the farmlands and mountains of Idaho. Since the death of a child is a heavy topic, Ms. Urie gives her readers a breather by adding human-interest stories such as one about her sons catching a leech in the Boise River (First PlaceWriters Digest Short Story Contest.)
The bereaved have difficulty concentrating; therefore, Tears is written in short, easy-to-read chapters. Shaded boxes at the end of each chapter contain a few paragraphs of pertinent advice. Letters Ms. Urie wrote to her deceased son, Sean, offer a glimpse into the dark world of grieving and follow her progress as the light slowly begins to seep back in.
Each person grieves in his/her own way. Yet, they share many common emotions such as shock, denial, anger, guilt and depression. Readers will identify with, and learn from, the many mistakes Ms. Urie made in her grieving process as well as the wisdom she gained.
Is there really life after death? Surveys show that tens of millions of Americans believe in ESP, reincarnation, encounters with angels and similar ideas. Ms. Urie pled with her deceased son, Sean, to give her the answer to that question and she relates the many ways in which he did let his family know that he was okay. Although she is a Christian, she doesn't proselytize in More Than Tears, nor does she encourage a belief in the paranormal. She tells her story as it happened and leaves her readers to draw their own conclusions. She emphasizes that it is important for the grieving to cling to their beliefs, whatever they may be, that answer their questions and bring them peace of mind.
Time heals is a common belief, but successful recovery takes more than time. In order to recover well, you must work through your negative feelings and redefine your role in life. What you resist, persists.
Good grief is the labor involved in dissolving physical bonds while allowing the spiritual bonds to remain intact. Included are 5 symptoms to indicate when you are healing and 5 to indicate when you are not.
Attitude You can't control the traumatic experience that led to your loss but you can control your response to it.
Grief work is the hardest work you will ever have to do, but it is necessary in order to take back control of your life.
Divorce is common after the death of a loved one, especially a child. When two people are drowning, it's difficult for one to save the other. Communicate with your spouse but don't add to the heavy burden he/she already carries.
Children are often the forgotten grievers. When they are old enough to love, they are old enough to grieve. It's just as important for them to express their anger, pain, fear, and guilt as it is for an adult.